Freedom (for me)!

One semester down!

Before I came to college, I gave my mother a short manifesto on missing people. Something like this (excerpted from something I wrote just before graduation – my actual speech was much less smooth and probably insanely overemotional):

It doesn’t really matter if I miss some specific friend, because I should just take responsibility and do something to get back in touch with them. But I’m going to miss the all the people I sit near in class, and all the people that I can enthusiastically wave to in the hallways, and the people I sometimes talk to after school when we’re all bored. It’s like…I’m close enough to them to miss them, but not so close I could actually email them without feeling awkward. And if we see each other again, we could probably spend a little time catching up, but it’s not like we could make plans to keep getting together in the future. Not much I can do about that.

I’m not that outgoing, so it’s not like I need to be surrounded by many people. But I like having people who kind of…float around, without getting too close to you. Cool people with their own interests and in-groups, who you just see around during the day. That’s how you know you’re in a community, not a clique.

And, well, my prediction was pretty much accurate. It’s not like I sat down and thought about how much I missed everybody, but when I came back to visit you all today, I just felt really refreshed. Because it’s one thing to be nostalgic while thinking, “oh, I miss Person A and Person B…” and another to watch people pop out of nowhere, suddenly remember their names, and realize that you had shared some good times with them not too long ago.

Realistically speaking, I’m never going to have my IB community back, but I had part of it today! And it made me really happy. Thanks, adorable seniors. πŸ™‚

2 responses to “Freedom (for me)!

  1. I think this is how I’ll feel too. I’ll miss the community here. And if we come back for a reunion, I’d slip back into the IB version of me, and say names in my high-pitched and squeaky voice, and it’d almost be like being back in IB again. Almost is good enough for me.

    I’m glad you came back though. πŸ™‚

  2. I’m glad you came back, too! I wasn’t expecting it at all since you’re usually…all the way up there. But yes, seeing you was such a pleasant surprise and I wish I could’ve seen more of you. Alas, my schedule is two times busier this year…but that was to be expected, almost, right?

    πŸ™‚ Here’s hoping to see you soon (on Skype, too xD)!

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